Things You Never Expect...

Or you ever want to see!

Well, I flew to NC over a week ago to see my dear future wife, Amy. It was awesome. We spent 48 hours together and it was not nearly enough time to be with her. We drove around the area. I met her parents. We had an easy, relaxing, and wonderful weekend together.

On Saturday we drove to a little town in SC. We stopped at a tack and feed store just to look around. That is the kind of shopping a horse addict does :-) And I think its wonderful and cannot wait to be married to this beautiful, loving, understanding, and crazy woman. She is crazy because she said "yes" to me,

While at this store, I bought a small bottle of Coke. One of the glass kind. The kind that needs a bottle opener. Now where I am from, we call those openers "church keys". I don't why, but that is just what they were called. So I asked the girl at the register if she had a "church key". She said "a what?" So I said "something to open this bottle with". She said "oh. I don't think so, let me ask".

She then turned to another teenage girl clerk behind her and asked "do you have something to open this bottle with?" The girl looked at us and said "prepare to be amazed."

Now when someone says "prepare to be amazed", you tend to think it is just bravado and they are just being silly. Oh, but now we come to the title of this post. This young girl was about to amaze us. She could not have been much more than 16. But she was about to prove her worth.

She takes the bottle from me and holds it up to her mouth. Then using nothing but her teeth she begins to remove the bottle cap. To counter the force and continue the removal, she then used her tongue to press against the bottle cap as she lifted it with her teeth.

Yes, we were amazed. Shocked actually. Slightly disgusted. But amazed none the less.

The first girl, who was thoroughly grossed out, said "they are not going to want to drink it now that you rolled your tongue on it." So this impressive bottle opener wipes down the open end of the bottle with the underside of her sleeve. Yes, basically her arm pit. I am not making this up.

So what do you do when things you never expect happen?

I did the most gallant thing a man could do. I said "Well I am amazed and impressed. I want to shake your hand." And I did shake her hand. The first clerk said "you're not going to drink that are you?" I responded in my manliest means possible, so as to not be shown up by a little girl, "if she is going to open it like that, then yes I am going to drink it."

So I did, I took the first big swig. I then handed the bottle to Amy. Who looked at me as if to say "I cannot believe I am doing this" but what she said was "well, you got most of the germs off of it anyway" and she tipped it up and took a swig.

Now how could you beat that?

Well I didn't want to try to beat that. But we did finish the botlle of Coke together. I think Amy did take the last drink, getting all my backwash anyway. So there it is. Things you never expect, and never really wanted to see.

I hope this is just a small sample of the fun, adventures, and good spirits that Amy and I will share together. I can handle all things with her by my side. I love you Amy.


Copyright 2005, Kevin Farley (a.k.a. sixdrift, a.k.a. neuronstatic)